Scott Matthew Vaughan - Online Memorial Website

wow.. sometimes i think about how long its been.. then sometimes i feel like its only been moments that you've been gone...  some days i just miss you.. i just plain miss you.. something happens and i laugh and i think "scott would get this.. scott would be laughing right along with me"..  i miss that..

sometimes i just wish things would have been different.. i wonder what our life would be like now.. we could've made it.. we would have been ok.. i know that.  i just wish things could have been different.

i've never loved anyone the way i loved you..  wow, what a rush!! the way i could look at you and know you were thinking exactly the same thing i was!!  i snicker now thinking about times that you and i would giggle forever!! our stomachs would hurt we would laugh so hard.. the way we just melted together.. the way we just "got" each other!!  you were so funny! i would have a permanent smile on my face when you walked in the room!  just the look in your eyes and i grinned!!  it was so hard to be focused at work sometimes because i would be so taken with you!! i remember seeing you at work one time and almost tripping because i was so captured by you... haha!!  we had some really good times... when we went camping and hid in the tent!! we left whats-his-name outside by himself so we could just chill in the million degree tent together!!  oh, it makes me laugh now...  =) 

i miss you every day... there truly isnt a day that goes by that i dont think of you.. i just wish things could've been different thats all... my heart still belongs to you no matter what i do... i'm still mrs. scott vaughan...  i knew from the moment i met you that i would marry you one day... even told a friend of mine.. "i'm gonna marry that man"...  i'd do it again in a heartbeat... 

Memories.... I struggle to separate the good from the bad. I miss what we had. I feel cheated from the future vowed to me. Our anniversary approaches and the countdown begins. Same as last year. I miss your family, but my heart breaks each time I go to dial the phone to tell them that I love them. The tears come and the call cant be made. I tell myself that I need to move on, let go of this pain that now defines my life. It soon becomes obvious that its just empty words that I can't force myself to live by. I tell the story to people who become friends. People tell me that I'm strong and cant believe that I haven't completely fallen apart. Little do they know that I fall apart every day when I wake in our bed alone. Only to look to my left and see your face.

Scott is the only man who ever:

knocked on my window at night just to cuddle..

made me feel beautiful.

made me laugh so hard, my ribs hurt.

gave me strength.

loved me despite my shortcomings.

accepted me for everything I am, and everything I'm not.

made me feel like nothing in the world could hurt me.

sent me flowers for no reason.

whispered "I love you" every night, even if he was mad at me.

made me complete...

Our Wedding Day:
We eloped!  Families, we know you weren't thrilled!!  We had an appt at the courthouse at 10:45 a.m. October 20, 2005.  We were early, so went in the freezing Ohio rain to get coffee across the street.  We were sooooo excited!!!  In a matter of minutes, we would finally be married, something we had talked about endlessly over the years.  After having coffee, we held hands and skipped across the street.  We were married there, looked into each other's eyes and vowed to love the other for the rest of our lives.  Neither of us had ever known what true love was until we met.  We were each other's first TRUE love.  Without judgement, prejudice, condition, or self intent.  We finally found each other!!  After being married in a small room with just the two of us and the mayor, we skipped to the car and did the typical newlywed drive through a strange town.  It was the happiest day of our lives.  We had both been previously married, but agreed that this was the real one.  This is the one we did just for us.  Our love, finalized and brought together in a room with just the two of us staring into each others' eyes. 
It was the happiest day of our lives.  That, we were both certain of.